The Golden Club

Jun 4, 2021

0 455

The morning after a night on the town in Minneapolis, Bob told his friend about the Golden Club that he had been drinking in. Everything in the club was lined with gold. The glasses had a gold rim, the rail on the bar was plated with gold, even the urinals were gold plated.

Bob was ready to believe his buddy until he mentioned the gold plated urinals so he phoned the Golden Club. “Is it true that the glasses in your club have a gold rim?” Bob asked.

“Yes, it’s true” replied the voice on the other end.

“And is the rail on the bar plated with gold?” asked Bob.

“Yes it is” was the reply from the other end. ”

“And, one more thing, is it true that the urinals are gold plated?” inquired Bob.

Bob could hear the person on the other end yell to the band “Hey Joe, I think I found the guy that took a leak in your saxophone last night!”

A Few Days

Jun 4, 2021

0 167

A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being payday, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire paycheque.

When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.

Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him. “How would you like it if you didn’t see me for two or three days?”

To which he replied. “That would be fine with me.”

Monday went by and he didn’t see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Come Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.

Unlucky Nun

Mar 11, 2021

0 104

There was a guy in a bar one night that got really drunk. I mean really, really, really drunk.

When the bar closed he got up to go home. As he stumbled out the door he saw a nun walking on the sidewalk.

So he stumbled over to the nun and punched her in the face. Well the nun was really surprised but before she could do or say anything he punched her again.

This time she fell down and he stumbled over to her and kicked her in the butt.

Then he picked her up and threw her into a wall. By this time the nun was pretty weak and couldn’t move.

So then he stumbled over to her, put his face right next to hers and said. “Not very strong tonight, are you Batman?”