AOL Prank Calls

Jun 5, 2021

0 293

Actual recorded Prank calls to AOL

Call placed to 1-800-4-ONLINE, the number to order an AOL startup kit.

::::::::ring::::::::
AOL: America Online, this is Diane speaking.
Me: Hi, I have some questions about American Online before I join.

AOL: Okay sir what’s your question?
Me: Well, some of my friends who have AOL say they get something called “cybersex”… does this cost extra?

AOL: :::quiet laugh in the background::: Well sir…I don’t know how to explain this, but cybersex is not part of America Online.
Me: Oh really? My friends said they got it from AOL.

AOL: Well its something members typically do when they go to a chat room.
Me: Humm…I don’t understand, what is cybersex??

AOL: I’m sorry I really don’t know how to explain it.
Me: Humm..well, have you ever had cybersex?

AOL: Sir I don’t think that’s an appropriate question to be asking me. Is there anything else you need?
Me: Sorry, like I said I don’t even know what it is.

AOL: That’s okay sir, anything else?
Me: Yes, I have one more question.

AOL: Go ahead
Me: What are you wearing?

Bitter Men Say

Jun 5, 2021

0 415

Bitter men say the cutest things.

I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always.

It’s not true that married men live longer than single men. It only
seems longer.

Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was nearly impossible.

A man complaining to a friend: “I had it all – money, a beautiful
house,a big car, the love of a beautiful woman … then … pow! …
it was all gone!” “What happened?” asked the friend. “Awww, my wife
found out.”

Wife: Let’s go out and have some fun tonight.
Husband: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway
light on.

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street
bald and still think they are beautiful.

I Like How You Think

Jun 5, 2021

0 114

A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn’t paying attention, so she asks him, “If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?”

Johnny says, “None.” The teacher asks, “Why?” Johnny says, “Because the shot scared them all off.” The teacher says, “No, two, but I like how you’re thinking.”

Johnny then asks the teacher, “If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?”

The teacher says, “The one sucking her ice cream.”

Johnny says, “No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you’re thinking!”

Computer Women

Apr 12, 2021

0 189

A .. HARD-DISK Woman: She remembers everything you say and do, FOREVER.!!!

B… WINDOWS Woman: Everyone knows that she can’t do anything right, but you can’t live without her.

C… EXCEL Woman: They say she can do a lot of things but you mostly use her for only four of your basic needs.

D… SCREENSAVER Woman: She is good for nothing functional, but at least she is exciting, colourful, and lots of fun!

E… INTERNET Woman: Difficult to access and hard to keep running.!!!

F… SERVER Woman: Claims to be available to you, but Always busy when you need her.

G… MULTIMEDIA Woman: She has a way of making horrible things look very beautiful.

H… CD-ROM Woman: She always has you on the move, going faster and faster.!!!

I… E-MAIL Woman: Out of Every ten things she says, eight are plain nonsense.

J… VIRUS Woman: Also known as “WIFE”; when you are least expecting her, she shows up, installs herself, and starts gobbling up all your resources. If you try to uninstall her, you will lose almost every thing. If you don’t try to uninstall her, you will still have nothing.